Parenting Question: Why Have Children?

Tips to Enrich Your Child's Life!

Child rearing takes a decent amount of common sense, which as some genius pointed out was not all that common after all. A good deal of love and caring and a genuine unselfishness where kids are concerned are mostly all it takes to make life for kids as pleasant as possible, if not at least bearable. Folks who are in short supply of any of these ingredients really should reconsider the big leap into parenthood.

Child rearing Photo Courtesy morguefile.com

Most folks will not consider buying a house if they know they can't make the mortgage payments. They wisely rent or share accommodation and lead comparatively stress-free lives. Which is why I don't get why folks with no time for anything but work, who can't imagine putting anyone else first, or don't have the finances to feed a cat, go about having babies like they came off a discount store shelf. Folks who do have the finances, go ahead and swamp them under a deluge of toys and the latest electronic gadgets, possibly imagining they are doing their best for their baby. While toys and gadgets have their role, parenting definitely calls for more than shopping skills. Parenting techniques are often sheer instinct and these are always attuned to the well being of the child. 

Parenting Photo Courtesy morguefile.com

Parents who do not give of themselves and play an active, hands-on role often don't realize the harm they could be inflicting. They then proceed to feed them out of cans and let them loose on the streets 10-12 years later in various avatars of public menace. So who's responsible for this outcome? The public? No! The government? No! Childcare? No! The kids themselves? No! Parents? Yes!!! Were these kids born menaces? No! Were they brought up to be such messed up beings? Yes!!! 

Having a child you don't have the time for is a grave injustice. What's more, most parents don't even realize the tragedy of their loss till it's too late. They had the opportunity to bring a well-adjusted, happy, healthy individual into the world, and they let it slip through their fingers.

Do parents intentionally take this path? Not always. Mostly it's brought about by varying degrees of selfishness, ignorance, and downright stupidity on the part of either or both parents. Often times parents don't realize the gravity of the responsibility involved in the care of a little helpless human being. Then there are the social factors ranging from domestic violence to divorce and cheating spouse to mad inlaws--factors which can throw even the most well-meaning parent out of whack and make child rearing a nightmare. 

So, why have children? We could go by scientific reasons such as the need to propagate the species, the instinctive drive to disseminate our genetic material, to quirky personal ones such as I'm going to bring up a kid and show mum how it really should be done. But science and weird quirks aside, there is the urgent drive for motherhood or fatherhood that strikes unannounced, the sheer pleasure of watching a baby grow up before your eyes, and the feeling of accomplishment that lets you rest in peace at the end of your journey knowing you've brought up a winner, even if you didn't win the Nobel Prize for parenthood.